What’s All This About Self-Care?

Isn’t this just BS for all the things we do for ourselves anyway? Like, DUH I brush my teeth and get dressed?! Why do people call setting the table or sitting with a cup of coffee “self-care”?

I remember the first day of my marriage and family grad school program when the director mentioned “the importance of self-care”. I was expecting to hear about things that took effort, time and calories - or all of the above. Instead I was introduced to deep measured breathing and simple, intentional acts. At first, I internally shrugged and thought these items were the least of what I needed to learn on my journey to become a therapist.

Six and a half years later, I smile at that version of me. As it turns out, self-care is the foundation for good mental health after all. We can be using all of the theories and tools there are - and if we’re not also implementing self-care, we’re not getting the results and progress available.

Rather than shrug off the idea of self-care, let’s do an exploration. First, let’s adjust our mindframe from thinking that care for self comes last. After we’ve exhausted our work efforts, chores, studying or parenting. That is exactly opposite. Care comes first and it starts with our mindsets.

Concept Number One: We are worthy of care and we need to intentionally provide care for ourselves daily.

Concept Number Two: Self-care improves our well-being and ability to perform in each area of life.

Concept Number Three: Self-care is more than doing ourselves a favor, it is helping our minds and bodies process stress.

Concept Number Four: Self-care is easily incorporated into everyday life.

Here are some self-care basics for you to try. As long as you’re doing at least one a day, you are off to a great start! Deep measured breathing and physical activity are the rock stars of self-care. If you don’t have time for a work out, you might have time for several minutes of jumping jacks as you (or your kids) transition from one task to another.

A good bedtime routine that incorporates all five senses is helpful in letting your body know it’s time to cool down for a good night’s rest (another form of self-care). A specific scent, some lotion, soothing sounds, soft bedding really help you ready yourself to relax. Turning off electronics and any media-stimulation a good hour+ before your routine begins is also very helpful.

Other forms of self-care involve hobbies, creativity or cooking. Hunting and sports are self-care, too. Puzzles, adult coloring, painting, sewing, drawing, knitting, weaving, crafting, gardening and cooking come to mind for indoor self-care.. I ended up crocheting my way through grad school and learned how satisfying each row, each design became. My hands were raw from the 17 afghans of yarn rubbing against me and worth every evening spent unwinding from all the brain work.

I wish you success in finding the self-care actions and activities you resonate with - and remember, they can change with the seasons of life!